Let the vacation begin!

Following the completion of my CELTA course at the end of July, my vacation time officially began! I decided to take advantage of the proximity of Czech Republic to Germany (right next door) and take a bus ride to visit my friend Annetta who I had met when the Logos Hope visited Trinidad 2 years ago. She and her husband live in Klinenberg, a small village 40 minutes drive away from Frankfurt. It was so nice to be able to spend time just reconnecting and sharing with each other. We also spent time doing sightseeing in the neighbourhood - the ancient architecture was really lovely to see. I also had the privilege of joining in worship by a river while some new converts identified publicly with the Lord in water baptism - it was so cool singing the German version of worship songs that I knew in English.

Traditional German architecture

Overlooking the vineyards

Spaghetti and meatballs ice cream!

From Germany, it was then on to London, England. This was the third time for the year that I was getting to spend time with my sister and her family and I loved it! My nephew is the sweetest baby - he really doesn't cry unless he is fighting a sleep. He is now on to solid foods and he loves his belly - we can't feed him fast enough :) Because of his nap schedule, we limited our sightseeing to places close to where she lives in Greenwich. It was nice to visit places that were so close that we had never been to before. And of course, there is no such thing as too much time spent with family. I also got to spend some time with friends from secondary school, and one from university who drove with her family for 5 hours one way just to see me :) When I first met these friends, I had no clue that, 20 years later, we would still be in touch.

Who would have thought the sun would work in London in August?

Friends and flowers

Tulip staircase in the Queen's House in Greenwich

My next stop was the United States of America. The first state I hit was New Jersey, where I was able to spend time with some cousins that I had not seen for the past three years. It is always amazing to me how much her children love me, seeing as my visits to them are so few and far in between, but there is connection there that is unmistakably real and strong. Even though the time was short, it was really enjoyable. They refused to let me take public transport to the bus stop in Manhattan when it was time for me to leave. Instead they piled up the whole family into the car and drove me there, waiting until I was almost ready to go before they left. The love is real I tell you!

The girls made me a welcome poster <3

Cuzzin love!!!!

It reach to de next generation :)

From New Jersey I journeyed to Baltimore where I got to spend time with my younger sister and her family. It was such fun to spend time with my nephews - now that they are older, there are so many activities I can do with them and places to take them that they can appreciate and enjoy. One of the highlights of this trip was being able to take them for a ride on their local subway - a treat that they do not normally enjoy because both their parents drive. The joy on their faces when we took the bus home after a morning downtown really made you appreciate the simple things that gladdens the heart of a child. They are both so intelligent and adorable and I wish they didn't live so far away so I could get to see more of them. My last stop before returning home was Miami, where I got to see, as her husband puts it, my friend, but she is so much more than just my friend. I truly treasure any time that I get to spend with her and her family.

We took a day trip to Washington

The shark obsession continues...

Heart sisters :)

I thank God that my vacation really didn't cost me anything much. I had to get back to Trinidad after my course was over anyway - I just took the scenic route home ;) God has strategically placed my friends and families in the places I had to pass through so I didn't have to worry about board or lodging and there was no shortage of love as I got to spend time with those I don't normally get in person. For me, it was not so much about the places that I got to go, but the people that I got to enjoy them with.

A friend loves at all times, and a brother is born for a time of adversity.
Proverbs 17:17

If your Presence does not go with us

As Moses was preparing to lead God's people through the wilderness, God promised that His Presence would go with them. In Exodus 33:15, Moses told God, "If your Presence does not go with us, do not send us up from here". When the option arose for traveling to the Czech Republic to study teaching English to foreign language speakers, as excited as I was for the opportunity to do this course that I had wanted to pursue for the past two years, my prayer was the same as Moses'. I had no desire to go where God's Presence would not be with me. But after getting confirmation from God that this was where He was leading for this season of my life, I booked my ticket and was on my way.

Pleasantly surprised to bounce up my CARIFES

friend Tomy in the plane on his way to World Assembly

We definitely felt God's presence every step of the way. When we landed in the airport in Czech, we had a smooth transition through immigration,collected our bags and walked straight through Customs. As soon as we got outside, we saw the guy holding a sign from the school. He took us straight to the apartment where were we staying, pointing out in his limited English the nearby shopping center, and also where the school was. We didn't realise what a blessing this was until we got to the school on Monday and found out that the driver had forgotten to pick up one of our colleagues who had flown in on Sunday. He had no idea where he was staying, so he ended up taking a taxi to the school and just waiting there until someone rescued him! We, on the other hand, were able to get some basic groceries for the first few days, unpack, shower, and settle in for a good night's rest after our 17 hours of flying. The Presence of the Lord!

Beyond grateful to have this green space right outside

our apartment window :D

Since we were warned about how intense the course would, we decided to so some sightseeing before it started. Our apartment is conveniently located 3 minutes away from a shopping center that contains a full fledged mall with a huge food court, a metro station, 2 supermarkets, a bank, pharmacy, stationery store, and many, many eating places. We had received some guidelines from the course co-ordinator about how to access public transportation from where we were staying, but when we went looking for the metro station we found that it was closed for the week. We asked someone in a store for advice and she told us to get a bus and pointed us in the direction. When we got to the bus stop however, we had no idea which bus to take. While we were looking at the schedule and trying to figure it out, a lady offered to help us. When we told her where we wanted to go, she said she was going to a station that was only one stop away so she offered to go with us! 

Martina was an angel in disguise

Martina helped us to navigate from the bus to the nearest functioning metro station. She changed our notes into the coins we needed to buy tickets, and advised us about the best ticket to buy based on where we were going. She also showed us how to validate the tickets, and how to know which train to take to get us to our destination. While we were waiting, she warned us about the crowds and being wary of pickpocketers when we got into Old Town, and suggested buying food further away from the Town Square because the closer you get, the more touristy the prices get. She even told us about a nearby castle that we could visit that would not be as packed with tourists because they don't know about it. Czechs by nature are not very friendly to foreigners, so we realized that she was really a God-send. The Presence of the Lord!

We touch down in Old Town Square!

It was really spectacular walking through Old Town. The architecture all around us was breathtaking. We behaved like true tourists, stopping every couple meters to take pictures LOL. Thankfully it was not that crowded but we were still vigilant. Thanks to google maps we were able to navigate our way around and visit Wenceslas Square, Old Town Square, the oldest functioning Astronomical Clock in the world, the Jewish Quarter and the beautiful world-famous Charles Bridge. We were intrigued by the number of museums we passed - Museum of Sex Machines, Lego Museum, Museum of Puppet Art, and Museum of Medieval Torture.

View of Tyn Church from the top of the

Astronomical Clock tower

After a few hours of walking around the heat was starting to affect us so we headed home. We found out afterwards that we had been experiencing a heat wave that was affected parts of Europe, and the temperature had gotten up to 37 degrees celcius that day! When we got home, we just wanted to get a shower and relax in preparation for the next day but we could not get into our apartment. Although the key was turning and we heard the lock moving, we could not figure out how to get the door open. We tried again and again but it wasn't budging. After about 5 minutes of trying, I prayed that God would send someone to help us. Not too long after an elderly gentleman came out of an adjacent apartment. He didn't speak a word of English, but we were able to use gestures to tell him about our predicament and he  came to our rescue. The Presence of the Lord! Unfortunately we were not able to ask him what he did to get it opened but at least we were finally inside and able to relax.

View from my bedroom window at 9pm

The first day of class was pace - session after session with information being thrown at us from 9am to 6pm. Thankfully our classmates are a cool bunch so we were able to have fun getting to know them during the breaks. We have people from Czech Republic, Slovakia, Russia, Serbia, Iran, England and USA. In talking to two of them, we realized how blessed we were with the apartment we were assigned - they had a gas stove but no way to light it for 3 days, and on the third day, a water pipe was burst when the maintenance guy was repairing a light issue. Thankfully we have a fully functioning electric stove so we are able to prepare hot meals whenever we want to. Our biggest issue (apart from not knowing how to open our front door) was a blown light bulb in the toilet. Our apartment is only a 3 minute walk away from the school, so we don't have to spend time or money commuting every day. The Presence of the Lord!

Taking in some fresh air during one of the breaks 

By the end of the first day, we were mentally exhausted but we couldn't rest because we had to prepare to teach a lesson the next day. When we tried to open the door, we found ourselves in the same situation as the previous day. We were hungry and tired and just wanted to get inside so once again I prayed for God to send someone to help us. We knocked on the door where the old man lived but no one responded. There was one other door on our floor so we knocked on the door and a young man came out. Thankfully he spoke English so he was able to explain to us what we needed to do to get the door open. The presence of the Lord!

The cafeteria food is surprisingly tasty and very affordable:

my first meal - camembert in corn bread crumbs with 

potatoes and cranberry mayonnaise

I had dinner, took a shower and had a short nap. I got up at 9pm ready to work on my Teaching Practice Preparation. I figured I could work until midnight and still get a decent rest before the next day of class; I was even prepared to push until 1 or 2am if I had to. The picture below reflects the state of my brain when I started my preparation. It was just swirling with the amount of information we had received that day, and I had no idea how to start sifting through it to apply it to our assignment. Even though I had years of teaching experience with ALTA, this was the first time I had to come up with a lesson plan so it took me a few hours to figure out what I had to do. My friend kept checking on my progress and could not understand why it was taking me so long to finish.

My table on the first night of Teaching Practice Preparation

I really had to call on God to help me marshall my thoughts and start writing something that made sense. I downloaded the lesson plan template that the school provided and started using it as a guide. At one point, I was thinking I should not have to work so hard, I don't really need this certification I just need the training so if I didn't pass the assignment that was no big deal but the Holy Spirit reminded me of a memory verse I had taught the children from Bible Club: Colossians 3:23 - Whatever you do, work at it with all your heart, as working for the Lord, not for men. So I continued working until I was finally able to head into my bed at 4am.

Ready for my first day of teaching English

to Czech students

When I got to the school I went to the library to print my lesson plan. One of the tutors was there to help us in case we had problems using the printer. She noticed my lesson plan on the computer and then proceeded to inform me that I had used the wrong template. Instead of just writing up the procedure for my lesson which should have taken 2 pages, I had done a full 7-page lesson plan - something that we had not been taught to do, and would not be required until week 2 of class! That explains why I was taking so much longer than my friend did to do her plan... I was not amused that I had lost all that sleep unnecessarily, but my tutor assured me that the time was not wasted as I would be better prepared for when we had to do the full plan the following week. When I reflected on it, doing the full lesson plan helped to give me the focus I needed to come up with the procedure (which was what was required) so it really was not wasted. The presence of the Lord!

Tutor comments on my first lesson

At every stage of this trip so far, the Presence of the Lord has been so evident that I know beyond the shadow of a doubt that I am where He wants me to be, doing what He wants me to do. There is no greater assurance than in knowing that you are in the center of the Lord's will for your life. I look forward to the journey that lies ahead.

Exodus 33:14 - And He said, "My Presence will go with you, and I will give you rest."

Changing lives, one camper at a time

Persons who have never been a part of the camping ministry are many times confused about why we do what we do. Why would anyone in their right mind take a week of their life to sleep in a room with 12-15 children on bunk beds with sometimes only one fan that cannot possibly give everyone breeze, in a place where sometimes creatures from the great outdoors do not remain outdoors; be limited to having showers only once a day with freezing cold water that is pumped up to the campsite from the river; convince a team of 30+ children to do chores such as washing the wares for 100+ persons, picking up garbage and cleaning toilets; all the while functioning on a maximum of 5 hours sleep per night because by the time you get your dorm settled for the night it is after midnight and counsellors rise is at 5am? We do this year after year, without any monetary compensation, because of the change that the ministry and environment at camp brings to the lives of the hundreds of young people that pass through our hands!

Each morning brings an opportunity to speak life into a camper

I had the privilege of serving with Christian Assemblies Camp at Easter camp 2019 for one week during the Easter holidays. The theme chosen was "When?" and the main message was that NOW is the day of salvation. Each day through the devotions, chapel sessions and afternoon presentations, campers were encouraged to surrender their lives to the Lordship of Christ, and to demonstrate the fruit of their salvation by meditating on the Word of God and displaying the signs of a renewed life as they interact with their friends and family members.

Dorm devotions form a critical component in the camping program

At the end of the first day of chapel, an altar call was given and I had the honor of leading one of the young ladies who responded to Christ. She was 17 years old and this was the first time she was taking the step to submit her life to Christ. Later on in the week, I felt led by the Holy Spirit to sit between two young boys on the back bench in another chapel session. At the end when the speaker asked if anyone wanted to surrender their life to Christ I heard a little voice next to me saying "Yes". He was a shy 7 year old so he did not want to go up to the front, so I explained to him what the Bible taught about how to be saved and right their on the back bench he prayed the prayer of faith. When his mother came up on camp to visit him later that week she was overjoyed because he had been asking about salvation before camp and now had made that step of commitment.

Camper responding to call for those needing pray during Sunrise service

Apart from chapel sessions, there were also many opportunities to speak truth into the lives of the campers. There was a 9 year old girl on my team who had a very disrespectful attitude which was evident from the first day of camp. On the last day of camp, I was able to speak with her about it, and she admitted it was an issue that she struggled with. We prayed together that she would continue to allow the Holy Spirit to work in her until she overcame that challenge. While helping the girls get ready for banquet night, a discussion arose about whether wining and provocative dancing is a sin, and that resulted in an informal lesson about our bodies being temples of the Holy Spirit. I also had the responsibility for facilitating two sessions with the younger ones at camp - one teaching them how to study the Bible, and the second one on how to share their testimony. Both sessions were very practical and the campers were very engaged in the activities that were developed to accomplish these teaching goals.

Applying the Bible study technique they

learnt to one of their memory verses

Even though I have been involved as a counsellor in the camping ministry for over 20 years, I continue to be amazed at the change that is seen in the campers lives and attitudes over the course of the week. At the beginning of the hike, there were some boys who were pushing past the slower ones in an effort to be at the front. By the end of the hike, these same boys were seen helping the younger ones over the more challenging parts of the trail. There were some young men who refused to open their mouths during worship for the entire week, but were seen singing lustily at camp fire on the last night of camp. My team had been not really been performing all week, but on the last full day of camp they really pulled together when it mattered the most, and they ended up taking first place overall for the week of camp. One of my campers had a learning disability, but yet he preserved and was able to say all of his memory verses before the end of the week. Campers who, in past years, were shy and would refuse to be engaged in activities in were verymuch involved in sports and even performed at Talent Night, enabling them to win an award for the Most Improved camper. We give God all the glory for effecting these changes in the lives of these precious ones.

Giving a helping hand

Victorious in the tug of war against teams with bigger

campers than themselves

Despite our preparation and planning for camp, there are always unforeseen circumstances that we encounter. But for every challenge that presented itself, God provided a solution. On the first day of camp we found ourselves without a nurse for every day of camp. One of the parents who has helped fill this post in the past came up to register her daughter and when we enquired, she shared that she was actually on holiday this week and did not mind filling in for the days we needed a nurse! Camp occurred in the middle of a very harsh dry season which was wrought with many bush fires in the hills of the Northern range, where the campsite is located. On the last full day of camp, one of these fires came dangerously close to the edge of the campsite, but the fire services responded in quick time and were able to prevent it from causing any damage to the property or endangering any lives.

The groundsmen kept a close eye on the fire overnight

to ensure that it did not reignite

There were so many moments which brought great joy during this week of camp, like the impromptu praise session in the girls dorm while they were getting ready for the afternoon session; seeing the excitement of the children while they had the opportunity to learn about different forms of ministry in a very practical way (puppetry, playing instruments, dance, sign language); and beating teenage boys in a swimming race :) I look forward to many more opportunities to serve as an agent of change in the lives of many more campers in the future.

Enjoying learning how to use puppets in ministry

Life lessons learnt from climbing a mountain

Two weekends ago I had the pleasure of climbing a mountain in Norway with my high school friend Jaemie and her 7 year old daughter Jahzara. It was a spectacular experience - the pictures here really don't do the actual scenery justice - and afterwards as I reflected on the memories I realized some of my observations are applicable to navigating through this journey of life.

The climb!

* Don't let the weather stop you from beginning

The weather forecast for Saturday was rainy all day, but the sun came out in the morning, so we made plans to go on our mountain hike. However, just as we were getting ready to leave the house, the weather changed and it began to rain lightly. We decided to go ahead with our plan, even if it meant us getting wet along the way.

Sometimes in life we wait for the ideal set of circumstances before we make a move. The reality is that life is full of unexpected surprises, and situations around us are always changing. If we allow external factors to influence our decision to move forward, we would never go anywhere.

Blue skies on the way

* Choose your mountain wisely

I know that I am not as fit as I used to be in my younger days ;) There are many mountains in Norway that we could have climbed, some that would have taken us 4 hours each way. I asked Jaemie to choose one that would not cause her to have to carry me on her back because I passed out from fatigue.

Even though it is good to challenge yourself with experiences outside of your comfort zone, you should be realistic about what you can handle. If not, you could end up having to abort the mission halfway through, or being an unnecessary burden to those around you.

At the start of the trail

* Pace yourself and make time for recharging

At the beginning of the trail we had lots of energy but as we began the climb it became more and more challenging to keep going. Jaemie had to keep reminding Jahzara to slow down as she just wanted to get to the top as quickly as possible. We stopped for a snack along the way up, and make sure to drink water all along the way.

Many times in the excitement of moving forward, especially when we are fresh and full of energy, we end up pushing ourselves without taking the time to recharge. If we continue at a rapid rate, sooner or later will end up burnt out. We should take time to take care of ourselves along the journey, to ensure that we make it to the end.

Jahzara showing off the quality of their mountain spring water

* Take time to enjoy the views along the way

When we were going up the mountain, we were facing forward most of the time. The first time we stopped and turned around, I was almost blown away by the beauty of the view behind me. There were also some spectacular displays of nature that we passed along the way that we could have missed if we were only focused on getting to the top.

There is a danger in being so focused on your goal that you miss opportunities to appreciate the beauty along the way: relationships that could have been enriched, experiences that could have been enjoyed, life lessons that could have been learnt.

Breathtaking view

* It helps to have people with you

The trail leading up to the top of this mountain was pretty straightforward and clearly marked out, but I am so glad I did not have to climb it alone. Having Jaemie there to look out for me and Jahzara there to entertain me was a great motivation for me to keep going when my muscles were crying out in pain.

It is always easier to endure the trials and overcome obstacles we face in this journey of life when we have people who are walking alongside us. It is a tremendous encouragement when we know that we are not alone. Having people who are supporting us and cheering us on is great motivation for us to continue persevering.

Steep parts along the trail

* Celebrate your victories

When we got to the top, we celebrated our accomplishment with hot chocolate and chocolate bars. This was actually motivation for some of us who felt like we couldn't go another step further. We also signed our names in a book for all those who had made it to the top.

We should never think it too extravagant to celebrate milestones in our journey. If we have accomplished goals we have set, this is a reason to recognize that achievement. There is a sense of satisfaction and fulfilment that comes when you persevere to the end, and this should be commended.

Enjoying a "Quick Lunch" before heading back down

As soon as we got to the top, the rain started falling lightly, and by the time we were ready to go back down, it started hailing so we quickly made our way back down the trail. Thankfully it eased up so we were not completely soaked, but even it if didn't it would still have been worth the climb!

That view!!!

* Listen to the advice of those who know better

On the way back down, Jahzara was jumping and leaping over the rocks along the trail. It took multiple warnings from her mother, outlining the possible injuries she could acquire to get her to slow down.

Many times, especially when we are moving at a quick pace, we may be likely to feel like we know better than those who have gone before us, and can see dangers that we are oblivious to. We should be open to the advice of those see dangers that we are oblivious to due to how easily and quickly we are progressing.

We all made it safely back down in one piece

As with any journey, there were difficult points along the way, but at the end, the wonderful moments made it all worth it. It may not be smooth sailing all the way -  there will be painful moments, times when you feel like giving up, but there are good times as well, and the lessons learnt along the way form part of the reward.

Enjoying the spectacular displays of nature along the trail

Before they call I will answer

Before they call I will answer

While they are still speaking I will hear

Isaiah 65:24

One of the amazing things about the God that we serve is that He knows what we stand in need of long before we recognize that need, and He makes provision for that need many times without us realizing what is happening. This is exactly what we experienced in the preparation for and execution of Ekklesia Camp 2019!

Some of the 300 persons who were at camp this year

Ekklesia Camp was started by Uncle Terry and Aunty Carol 38 years ago as an outreach day camp on Carnival Monday and Tuesday to the community of Point Fortin. It is a free  day camp that is open to all ages in the community. We use the opportunity to share the Good News with all who attend, using practical truths they can relate to. Lunch is provided to all who attend, and the expenses of the camp are covered by donations. It was first held in their home in Harriman Park, but when the numbers started crossing 300 we moved to the nearby Egypt Village Primary School. We remained there for years, and when the school was renovated a couple years ago, we enjoyed the new and improved facilities immensely.

With a change of administration late last year, we were concerned that it would not have been as easy for us to access the venue for camp this year. The new administrator was only willing to grant us access to the auditorium and about 5 classrooms, which would not have been suitable for our needs, so, with just about one month to go before camp began, we started the search for an alternate venue. Our search led us to Point Fortin East Secondary, not far from our old venue, where the Principal was willing to allow us to use the school, even though there were 4 other groups who had requested it.

One of the classrooms at our new venue

Apart from being an older school in dire need of an upgrade, there were many challenges associated with this new venue. Teachers had to be very creative and innovative to enhance their classrooms to make it appealing to their campers. The school was huge, so we needed to restrict access to areas where we could monitor the children. The biggest hurdle, however, was the lack of kitchen facilities, which is essential for the operation of our Tuck Shop where we sell fish pies and pholourie made hot on the spot, and also for the distribution of lunch to the campers, and breakfast and dinner for those who were sleeping at the school. All we had to work with was an empty room. Thanks to our God who went before us and knew what we stood in need of, one generous sponsor donated $10,000 which was enough to purchase supplies for all the electrical and plumbing work needed to transform the allocated room into a functioning kitchen!

Washing up in our makeshift sink, resting on a iron frame placed

on ply boards which covered the drain where the water ran into

Three weeks before camp started, we found out that the couple who normally head the kitchen staff would not be available to serve this year. It is a major responsibility to cook for the 300 persons who would be at camp on Carnival Monday and Tuesday, and also the additional meals for the 20 persons who sleep on site. We had one person who had committed her time, but needed at least 2 others to assist. One day I was thinking about who we could ask, and an idea came to my head to ask a friend from a church in Point Fortin if she and her husband would be able to help. When I called, her husband asked about the menu and the quantities we normally cater for. He said he would speak to his wife and call me back. When he returned the call, he informed me that not only would he and his wife take responsibility for cooking lunch on both days but they would also purchase the ingredients from their personal funds! So instead of just getting cooks for camp, we got the next major expense of food totally covered!!! Talk about a God that provides for ALL your needs.

Ava enjoying her pelau lunch

Seeing the way in which God provided for this camp in the weeks leading up to its execution, we knew it was going to be epic. The theme chosen for this year - God's Followers - explored the world of social media. We have seen the impact of social media on the world we live in today - how many people get their sense of validation and identity from social media influencers. We wanted to use this theme to encourage campers to find their security, satisfaction and self worth from God, and to follow Him rather than who society says they should follow. Our Expo Center explored the dangers of social media, examining the impact of cyber bullying and fake news, among other things. The content was very practical and relevant to all age groups that passed through camp.

Chart in Expo showing how to be safe on social media

I had the pleasure of teaching the 3 and 4 year olds at camp. Some people do not think children this young can learn, but through story telling, drama, videos, songs, craft and puppet shows, these children learnt about the importance of following God's voice rather than the voice of the enemy, the role of Jesus in paying the price for our sin so we can be in fellowship with God, and how to live if they want to be God's followers. 

Craft showing how sin entered the world

Zaccheus collecting more money than he should before

he decided to follow Jesus

Totally engrossed in the puppet showing how to live in 

obedience to God

For this age group a lot of planning is needed to keep them engaged. Because of the number of activities we do, preparation beforehand is quite labour intensive, mostly involving cutting out items for the craft and object lessons. Thanks to those from my church who stayed at my home, I had lots of hands to help put together folders and make name tags and make posters and cut out all the materials necessary for craft. On the second day, 2 of our assistants were not able to attend, and God graciously provided 3 additional persons who were able to help manage the children. It was truly amazing to see how God put the right people in place just when we needed them.

The life of a teacher of the 4 & under class -

cutting and sticking

Apart from ministry on camp on Carnival Monday and Tuesday, we had devotions at home for those who stayed in my house. We spent time every morning studying the book of Ephesians, looking at what the verses taught about our identity in Christ, and how that was relevant to us in our daily lives as Christians. It is my prayer that the youths in particular would have recognised from that devotion that their identity should be defined by God's Word and not society, and that they would be challenged to study scripture for themselves and see what truths they could apply to their daily living.

The youths from my church who camped over at my house

A lot of seeds of truth were planted in the hearts and minds of the 240+ campers who attended Ekklesia Camp 2019. We pray that as they continue to engage with social media, that their mindsets would have shifted and their behaviour on social media would be more in line with the guidelines outlined in the Word of God, that those who claim to be God's followers would demonstrate this by obedience to His commands, and that they would influence others to follow the way of truth.

Impactful times of worship

                           May the words of my mouth

                            And the thoughts of my heart

                            Bless Your name, bless Your name, Jesus

                            And the deeds of the day

                            And the truth in my ways

                            Speak of You, speak of You, Jesus

                            For this is what I'm glad to do

                            It's time to live a life of love that pleases You

                            And I will give my all to You

                            Surrender everything I have and follow You

                            I'll follow You

What not to say

Over the past two weeks I had the experience of walking alongside two friends as they lost very close family members. Lots of things were said to the grieving families, but not all were helpful. In times of grief we want to show our support and help the persons feel better, because we do not like to see them unhappy. But grief is process that cannot be avoided or fast tracked, and as uncomfortable as it is for us to see our friends hurting, many times the hurt is necessary if they are to experience healing.

It is challenging to know what to say when someone dies, especially when the death was unexpected or traumatic in nature.

How are you?
Are we really prepared for the honest answer to this question? Especially when the death is still fresh, this question can be very frustrating for the family member: How do you think I am doing I just lost my parent/spouse/child/best friend?!!!! A better approach to express our concern about how the individual is coping is to ask more specific questions - are you eating? sleeping? breathing? These specific questions are easier to process compared to the generic "how are you" and the responses would better enable us to know in what areas the person might need more support.

What happened?
Our natural inclination, especially in instances where the death was unexpected, is to want to know how the person died. For the family members, having to retell the story over and over again can be very draining emotionally. Knowing the details is really just to satisfy our curiosity, and does nothing to help the loved ones. Of course, if they want to talk about it, we should let them talk, without interrupting with our own experiences of similar (or different!) losses.

<Insert your thoughts on why the person died>
When a death is not due to illness, one of the biggest questions the loved ones have is, why? Unless we have received a direct revelation from God that He has instructed us to share with the family members and friends, we should refrain from postulating about the reason why the person died. We know that ultimately God is sovereign and He determines the length of our days (Job 14:5) but it is our human thinking that causes us to question why a person died in the manner or time that they did. Just as God was not obligated to give Job an answer to his question about why he was suffering, God may not choose to give an explanation about the purpose for the timing of a person's death, and we should not 'play' God by giving an answer.

You will get over it
Even though the intense pain of losing a loved one may diminish over time, there will continue to be an empty space in the lives of all those who were dear to them. One of the consequences of loving someone deeply is that when the person is gone, the pain of losing them is tremendous. Those who are grieving will eventually find ways to go on living without the person who died, but they will never forget their loved one, nor should they.

God does not give us more than we can bear
First of all, this statement is no where in the Bible. The verse which is often misquoted and applied out of context is actually 1 Corinthians 10:13 - No temptation has overtaken you except what is common to mankind. And God is faithful; he will not let you be tempted beyond what you can bear. But when you are tempted, he will also provide a way out so that you can endure it.

Secondly, the reality is that many times when we experience pain, it feels like it is more than we can bear. But the beauty of being in relationship with God and in fellowship with His people is that we do not have to bear the hurt and pain alone - God is close to the broken hearted (Psalm 34:18), and has provided support for those who walk through the valley of the shadow of death (Psalm 23:4).

I don't know what to say
Many times, the best thing to say is nothing. Be sensitive to what the grieving friends and family are going through and what they need at the time. Sometimes they may just want a hug. Other times they may just want someone to sit and mourn with them like Job's friends did during his time of sorrow (Job 2:13) We should not feel like we need to "say something" to make them feel better because the reality is that it will take them a while to process the pain and hurt they are experiencing; it will not just disappear because of something that we said.

We can also look for practical ways that we can support the grieving family. Maybe they need someone to answer their phone so they don't have to keep repeating the same things over and over again. Maybe they need transport or company to do all the running around that is necessary in the days following a death in preparation for the funeral. Even after the funeral there is still a need for support. Maybe they would appreciate a home cooked meal since they would not be in a frame of mind to provide that for themselves. Maybe they need someone to look after their children for a while so they can take some time to process their grief on their own. Maybe they just need someone to touch base with them on a regular basis after the funeral, because even though everyone else has gone back to their normal activities, life for them will never be the same. Maybe they need someone to pray with them - not make promises to pray but actually stop what you are doing and pray with them.

May we be sensitive to the needs of those who are grieving the loss of friends and family members, and depend on God's guidance about how best we can be supportive of them in their time of need.

When Job’s three friends, Eliphaz the Temanite, Bildad the Shuhite and Zophar the Naamathite, heard about all the troubles that had come upon him, they set out from their homes and met together by agreement to go and sympathize with him and comfort him. Job 2:11