How I can still worship God as Healer when my loved one dies

 On January 15th 2024 I posted the following on my Facebook page:

"God answers prayer."

At the time when I posted it, three of my uncles were hospitalized - one was my father's youngest brother, and two were the fathers of my close friends. All three of them were critically ill, and surgery was not an option because of their age or current health challenges. I was praying for them, trusting that God would do a miracle to stabilize them so they could be released from the hospital. All of them are out of the hospital now, but only one is still here on earth.

Reading scripture for Uncle Learie
during his last hospital visit

When I wrote that facebook post, God had not yet answered my prayer for healing for my loved ones. I decided to post it in faith, believing that God could do what the doctors said was impossible. I chose not to wait until He answered my prayer, to acknowledge Him as the God who answers prayer. Because the reality is, even if the answer was "no", He would still have answered my prayer. His characteristic as a Prayer-Answering God does not change regardless of whether He has answered or not, or whether His answer is the one we were desiring.

With Uncle Anton's wife, after a hospital visit to Uncle Anton

One week after my facebook post, Uncle Learie was released from the hospital. It was really a miracle of healing, because there was no medical intervention done to resolve his issue - it was a divine touch from God. I went to visit him the day after he got home, he kept telling me that it would be the last opportunity I would get to the read the Bible for him. However, one month later, he is still here! God is clearly not ready for him as yet.

Uncle Learie is the eldest of the three, batting strong
at 94 years old and not out

Unfortunately the same cannot be said for Uncle Anton. After his release from the hospital two weeks later, his condition steadily deteriorated. When I visited him the Sunday before Carnival, his son-in-law told me he didn't think he would be able to make it to the end of the week. On Wednesday I messaged Aunty Cicely to find out how she was coping, and she said she would feel better if she got some starch mangoes. Thankfully I knew just where to get it and the next day I carried it for her. On that day, she confessed that she had accepted that her husband was dying and she was ready to release him, because he was in so much pain. When I realised that earthly healing was not God's will for Uncle Anton, I prayed that his suffering would not be extended. He died two days later.

Funeral arrangements for Uncle Anton

God is sovereign. He is the One who has numbered our days before one of them came into being. As our Creator, He has every right to determine how long we spend on this earth, before we are called home to eternity. It is His right to decide who receives earthly healing, and who does not; we trust His character of goodness that whatever He decides is best, no matter how painful it may be for us. This is why I can still worship God as Healer, even when He chooses not to heal my loved one. I may not agree with His decision or understand why He did it, but I choose to trust Him.

Isaiah 55:8 - “For my thoughts are not your thoughts, neither are your ways my ways,” declares the Lord.

Life is a bag of sweets

This is my tribute in honor of the passing of my Uncle, Vernon Dowlath, Daddy's youngest brother.

So grateful my brother captured this photo before three of them passed

When we were young, my parents were both working so they had to get creative about what to do with four children over the July/August vacation. After spending 2 weeks at VBS and 2 weeks at camp, the remaining four weeks we rotated between staying by Daddy's siblings. Uncle Vernon lived with my grandmother until he migrated to Canada over 20 years ago, and we enjoyed spending vacations at their house. His children were in our age group, and we spent many hours playing together.

Last lime before my cousins migrated

I will always remember Uncle Vernon's laugh and pleasant personality. Like all Dowlath men, he was LOUD when he ready, especially when he was making a point about something he was passionate about. When Daddy got sick, Uncle Vernon was one of the siblings who would consistently call to check up on him and chat with him. When Daddy died, Uncle Vernon continued to reach out to me and Mummy on a regular basis.

Thankful for the technology
that kept us connected

Uncle Vernon suffered many health challenges throughout his life. He had major surgery in 2021, but this never dampened his spirits. After his hospitalizations, he would get right back into life with all the vigour and strength he had. He had a strong faith in God, and would always let us know that he was praying for us. When our country's borders finally reopened, he made sure to come and visit us. He insisted on buying food for us to eat, because he said if he was living here, he would have made sure to feed us. Such was his generosity.

We let him provide the food and we did the drinks :)

In 2023, Uncle Vernon's health started to decline rapidly. He was in and out of hospital but was not getting better. Every New Years Day our family hosts a lime for Daddy's siblings and their families. This New Year's Day, Uncle Vernon messaged me to say he was looking forward to lunch, and wanted to know what was on the menu. He said he would take some ham, chicken pastelle, and a glass of kick-a-poo drink (Daddy's name for whatever blend of fruits Mummy makes, which is usually a big hit at these limes) He sent his best wishes to all the guests, and I offered to send him a video. When everyone arrived, I recorded a video of all who were there, and everyone sent greetings to him. He was grateful for the opportunity to see all who were present so contented and engaged.

Glad that he was able to partake in 
his last New Years lime virtually

Throughout January Uncle Vernon sent me a few messages which were forwards. I glanced at them, but like most forwards, I did not read them. However when Aunty Letto messaged me last week Saturday to say that she and two other aunts were going to Canada because it looked like Uncle Vernon had taken a turn for the worse, I was curious to see what was the last message he sent me. I was shocked when I read what he had sent on January 15th:

Beautiful poem by Mário de Andrade (Sao Paulo 1893 - 1945) Poet, novelist, essayist and musicologist.  One of the founders of Brazilian modernism

      ____________

      MY SOUL IS IN A HURRY

      I counted my years and discovered that I now have less time left to live than I had lived until now.

      I feel like the kid who won a pack of candy; He ate the first few with pleasure, but when he realized there were few left, he began to savor them deeply.

      I don't have time for endless meetings where we discuss bylaws, rules, procedures and internal regulations, knowing that nothing will happen.

      I no longer have time to put up with absurd people who, despite their chronological age, have not grown up.

      My time is short to discuss titles.  I want the essential, my soul is in a hurry...

 Without many sweets in the package...

     

      I want to live next to human people, very human.  Who know how to laugh at their mistakes, who are not vain of their triumphs. People who don't consider themselves elected before their time, people who don't try to escape their responsibilities. I am looking for people who defend human dignity, people who only want to walk on the side of truth and honesty.

      The essential is what makes life worth living.

      I want to surround myself with people who know how to touch people's hearts...

      People who have learned from the hard knocks of life to grow up with soft touches in their soul

      Yes..., I am in a hurry..., I am in a hurry to live with the intensity that only maturity can give.

      I intend not to waste any of the candy I have left... I am sure they will be more exquisite than the ones I have eaten so far.

      My goal is to arrive at the end satisfied and at peace with my loved ones and with my conscience.

      We have two lives and the second one starts when you realize that you have only one......

After reading it, I realized that he knew that he was going to die soon. I called my cousin the next day and asked her to call me when she got to the hospital because I wanted to pray with him. She put me on speaker, and I was able to pray that he would release any bitterness or unforgiveness or resentment he had, and that he would embrace Jesus as the way, the truth and the life. I prayed for comfort for my aunt and cousins. Four hours later, my cousin messaged me to say he had passed.

His last family lime with us

Take those photos. Embrace those moments. Savour those sweets before they all run out.